Scratching My Head......

First, let me say this: I just do not understand some people. I have learned a lot about myself, my family (close and extended) and my friends in the last year-and-a-half. I have learned that I need to let people care about me and I need to ask for help when I really need it. I have learned that I needed to cut-out some of the BS that was in my life that was only hurting me, and unfortunately that meant cutting off some friends and family. I have learned that there really are good hearted people out there that don't have self-fulfilling motives and that I can really trust. I have also learned that if I continue to build walls around myself, I may miss opportunities at wonderful friendships.

I actually have a close group of girlfriends now that we are in Columbus. It has helped significantly that I am now on days and evenings, of course. I haven't had that really since high school. We go with the kiddos to the zoo, parks and other outings and it is great. It's terrific to get out of the house and it's wonderful to bounce ideas off other mommies - often so I don't think I'm going nuts!

So, this is what has me scratching my head as of late. Angry, hateful people who have been given, and I mean GIVEN, everything they practically have. It's the hateful manner in which they choose to live by that gets me. What is the reward for that? Do they really think that people don't see their negativity and nasty attitude? I think that they have to be rewarded in some fashion or they wouldn't keep acting the way they do. Is it so much easier to be unhappy than it is to be happy and thankful? I just don't get it. For example, wishing bad times for someone. What is that about? Why would anyone wish ill thoughts on another person and get enjoyment out of their pain?

What I come to work and see daily is nothing short of horrific. It keeps me in check as far as being thankful that I have a wonderful husband, beautiful child, a home that I love and am able to pursue my degree, among other things. I am just so thankful and it gives me so much joy to come home from a heart-wrenching day to my wonderful family.

So, this is my suggestion: come and spend a day with me at work. Come and see 30 and 40 year old mothers and fathers having to say goodbye to their children and significant others. Come and see what these people go through every day just to hopefully get 3-5 more years to live. Then, you can sit and decide whether or not to be hateful or thankful.